I got kicked til I Cried

Seems my holiday spirit has not yet caught up with my Mommy Holiday need to be in the spirit. My brain knows that I want to want to enjoy the holidays, but for some reason..my heart's just not in it.

First, I blamed it on  being to busy to enjoy the season with all the rehearsal's and the productions and just the hectic craziness that is the holidays. Then last Thursday,when I thought I was in the home stretch..wouldn't you know that something else came up.

Thursday, I picked my 5 year old up from school, a seeming innocuous event.As we are driving home and I start my routine of inquiring about her day, I am informed that her teacher , who previously made her the star of the classroom version of "What not to wear" and I've spoken to about her inappropriate behavior, has stricken once again.

Bella begins to recount a conversation that she had with her teacher. It went a little something like this; said teacher was speaking to Bella's friend who had been on vacation and had gotten sick.The teacher was telling the student that she has missed a lot of school.Bella was standing within earshot, and so the teacher decided to tell Bella ( in front of the other children) "You've missed a lot of school too, Bella!" To which my 5 year old said, "I had the Nutcracker last week." Now let me explain this, Bella missed Monday and Tuesday of last week due to incliment weather and impassable roads but Friday, she had an excused absence for her performance in the Nutcracker. The very same Nutcracker that she had been waiting to be a part of for 3 years, the same one she auditioned for in September, and the very same one that she has been rehearsing for 3 days a week for 4 months (Did I mention she is only 5?) This was a lot of work, followed by a week long of 2.5 hour long dress rehearsals EVERY night ( my girls were kept up for rehearsal, 2 hours past when they should have already been asleep.It was a big sacrifice and acheivement on the part of Bella).This teacher told Bella (in front of other kids..to her face, not in her own little brain..where the thought should have remained) "Well, the Nutcracker is NOT important..kindergarten is!"

My reaction was to become livid because 1) She has no business speaking to her about personal matters in front of other children 2) The Nutcracker was/is important to Bella who worked her little derriere off to be a part of it. What gives this broad the right to discount my child's achievements? Newsflash; Hey bitch,if I refuse to give my kids an inferiority complex..you sure as hell are not allowed to do so!Main problem being, this is not the first time that she has exhibited this sort of behavior.I have asked her NOT to do this before, to contact me directly.Each time I contacted her, I took a deep breath and I was very diplomatic. I was getting my Master's in Elementary Education when I was pregnant with Bella and I've been working in education now for 10 years, so I do know the ins and outs of the system. I know this woman needs to retire. This time I included the principal on the email.The principal said she would handle it, next morning first thing I received an email that the teacher would only send notes and communication through myself directly. Hopefully this matter is resolved. So, that started the break off with a bad taste in my mouth.

Then there was an incident where a family member took it upon himself to mock my blog and mimmick every food choice that I made while visiting.I am on Nutrisystem and I ate my Nutrisystem while there, but there were times where we were out starving and picked something up at a restaurant. I made my choices with the plan in mind. But all the while, I had this family member, mocking me. Cracking wise on my weight.( who the hell thinks its OK to comment on a woman's weight?) I bit my tongue,so I wasn't teaching my girls to be disrespectful towards their elders. And yes, he does know I'm on Nutrisystem.The straw that broke the camels back was when he decided to rant over what I was eating at a public restaurant,loudly enough to call the attention of the other patrons ( I was mortified) and then when we left. My husband was fastening the girls into their car seats. I was waiting to sit next  to them ( I was freezing),but his arm was in the way so I couldn't get all the way in.The family member said, maybe if you hadn't eaten so much, you'd fit! WTF?? I was flabbergasted. Yeah, and that was the third day of this type of behavior.Until, I couldn't take it anymore. I had been biting my tongue and then I woke up the next morning and had hit my threshold. I had to leave. I can only be gracious for so long. So, that's been the start to the holiday break! Seems everybody;s trying to kick this girl til she cries!

But I won't let them restrict the size of my heart!This heart will grow three times its original size!Damn the finances! Damn the separation!Damn expectation!Damn ignorant people with big boisterous voices! This is MY Blog...if you don't like it or you don't want to hear/care about what I have to say..Don't read it! Whatever you do, don't try to throw my own words in my face. I know what I have said.I am aware that words have effect on people and if used improperly can cut, like knives. I know that first hand.That's why I don't do that but lucky for me others do not subscribe to the rules of couth.

So, I am home and I am off to cuddle my girls and love the holiday light right out of them.We have 2 glorious weeks and the Big Guy will be joining us tonight or tomorrow, either way, we'll scoot in and make room.I just want to encapsulate the moment of togetherness because it will be fleeting but I promise; we will know it was here.What will you be doing to keep your spirits up and truly enjoy the important things...the family, the people, not just the things.Don't get caught up in the momentum, get wrapped up in the love.How will you do that this year for your family?

One more piece of happiness, yesterday (when I started this post) was the birthday of one of my favorite people in the world!Nik,love you like a sister and I am so glad that we met and became fast friends. It is so rare to find this kind of friendship as an adult. I truly do hope you were spoiled rotten yesterday and appreciated for all that you do for EVERYONE!Running around the world saving all the sickies one gurney at a time!You are an inspiration.Happy Birthday,love ya!

Throat Punch Thursday:This one's gonna get me IRL trouble Edition

It's Thursday and that can only mean one thing...THROAT PUNCH THURSDAY! Life has been a little more chaotic than usual around here with the beginning of kindergarten. I have my 5 year old trying to feel her way around and get acclimated. She's been feeling left out and overwhelmed  at school and I've been paying the price. Meanwhile, little sister is ducking to try and stay out of the way of flying tantrums, plus she is not without her own coping mechanisms.To say I have had my hands full is a grand understatement. Imagine my frustration when my 5 year old comes home and nonchalantly drops this bomb on me, "Mommy, my capris are not uniform dress code." Me: "What? What are you talking about honey? I read the list , they are fine." Bella:"No Mommy, in class the teacher made me and another kid stand up in front of the class and she said "THIS" is not dress code." Me:(in my head) WTF????? Did she just say she was on her kindergarten class version of what not to wear? You know the show where you are tried and convicted of fashion crimes? I calmed myself and thought, Breathe Debi.Wait for the note about the capris that will surely be sent home if they are not dress code appropriate. But that note never came. Shouldn't there be a note? I mean if it is serious enough to point it out to the entire class, doesn't it at least warrant a note? Or what, is my daughter supposed to wear them again and have a recurring role on What not to wear?
I emailed the culprit of such a heinous crime. I am waiting to hear her side before passing my final judgment. But in my mind, until I hear further, this is complete bullshit. My girl is already overwhelmed and feeling distraught about kindergarten, how the eff can theoretically pointing to her and laughing possibly make that situation better? I am pretty much pissed off to the extreme. It's hard enough letting go. Add to that the fact that now I don't feel like she is in capable hands and its that much harder. I met the transgressor, she seemed very nice and has been doing this for 15-20 years. This is no rookie. I don't let anyone, not ANY ONE, mistreat my child or make them feel like less than they are. I will go to blows with anyone who tries. Thats pretty normal right? I mean isn't that my job? Protector of the universe and defender of my children? I'm hoping something got lost in translation. I am fully aware that quite frequently 5 year olds tend to turn a simple notice into a meandering game of Chinese telephone. If I'm wrong in what I think has transpired, I am not to proud to apologize. But if a transgression has transpired, the offender has been put on notice. She now knows that my girl has an advocate who is paying attention.
Theoretical Throat Punch is most definitely being awarded to the person who did not use her common sense. You can't use someone's child as your own personal bad example...next time keep your thoughts to yourself and send me a damn note.I mean, what the hell can my kid do about it? She's 5, she doesn't dress herself. How in hell is my girl ever supposed to feel at ease if she is being called out for a damn button on her capris? Seriously, its not even a violation of dress code and if it were, it should have never have been pointed out to her in front of the entire rest of the class. Only my good sense and a Godly heart have convinced me to give her the benefit of the doubt.That same benefit is saving people from a literal throat punch.As a side note, just one more piece of ammunition for my girl to add to her arsenal of reasons why Kindergarten is suck! Come on people, you are not making it easy for me to convince little people that good things are waiting at school. Seriously. WTF?