Mommy Truisms; The Trust Your Gut Edition

It's been awhile since I've posted any of my truisms so I may have went overboard. Of course, they are all true and we all need to know that we are not alone in this crazy ride we call Motherhood. So, hang on to your cute little crocheted hats ladies...it's going to be an exciting and bumpy ride!Happy Mothering!

• No matter how much you spin, Turbo Jam,  or Zumba your body will never go back exactly the way it was before babies. It may be just as good but it is changed forever.

• If you've given birth, you WILL pee just a little if you sneeze or laugh too hard. Expect it. If you don't like it...Kegel it and/or get yourself some Mommy type pantie liners.You can not prevent this from happening, no more than you can prevent your stomach getting large when pregnant.

• Once you have a child, you will NEVER get enough sleep again...ever..for the rest of your life!

• Children can live on cheeze-its, string cheese and apples alone. I call it the connoisseur in training program. Add some grape juice to that combo and you are raising a child with a discerning palette.

• Stretch marks are not sexy...to anybody.Anybody who tells you they are is either a) a liar b) a liar or c) really desperate for sex and totally in love with you for giving birth to their big headed child:)

• If you ask your child a question and they a)smile...just a little bit ( more of a grin really) b)look away and say "I don't know" or "No" c) if they blush even the slightest whilst avoiding eye contact and  grinning; they are lying to you.

• Kids can be unintentionally cruel because half the time they know not the meaning of the words they are using, so always remember to take any insults they hurl at you with a grain salt.I realize it still hurts your heart but they DON'T mean it! If they did, I would have already thrown myself in the river as many times as my 3 year old has told me "Mommy, me hate you!", today alone.

• There is NOTHING, absolutely nothing, in the entire world that is sweeter than a two little arms hugging your neck and telling you "Mommy, you are the best Mommy in the whole wide world!"Of course, their world usually only includes your house...but hey, its nice to be queen:)

• NEVER underestimate the power of a good Mommy friend, no Mommy is an island. You need her more than you know. When you find a real one, put yourself into her loving hands. She could possibly save your life.

• When your little girl has her first crush and the little boy's Mom informs you that they will be attending the Nutcracker solely to see your daughter perform ( because the little boy has demanded it) try not to flash forward to her wedding and tear up.They really do grow up too fast, don't relinquish one moment of their childhood..in your head or otherwise.

• Some days, you may feel isolated, overwhelmed, exhausted and like you have completely lost your mind..you probably have but take solace in the fact that there are many more of us out there like you than you think or could possibly know.

• There will be a time in your Mommy life when you are on the fence whether you want another baby or not, when that happens and your ovaries start twitching and your uterus begging for a tenant, take a minute and think it over honestly. Remember, all the long sleepless nights, breastfeeding issues, explosive diarrhea diapers and then ask yourself... do I still want to go through that again?If the answer is yes or I don't mind...Go for it!  ( well, after consulting your spouse of course:)

• There is nothing more cute than a 5 year old and a 3 year old in their new dresses at a tea party, and nothing as lovely as the excitement and wonderment in their eyes when they watch the Nutcracker ( or anything to do with Christmas for that matter) ballet for the first time.

• As a mother, sometimes you will have to say, do things, be friends with people you don't like for your children's best interest..learn it, live it, love it!

• It is your right as the Mommy to refuse to let your child go on a field trip that has no chaperones, two teachers and 47 kids.Do not buckle under peer pressure. It's your child; it's your decision..final answer!

• In all things concerning your child's well being, trust your gut.It' s not just there for show, its there for a reason.

• There is something unresistably precious about a half asleep baby stumbling out of bed and climbing up into your life( Freudian slip) lap and cuddling (even if it is 10:30 and you're trying to write a post) let them. Savor the moment. Kiss the top of their head and bask in their cuddles.Soon, they will outgrow your lap.