Thursday, December 16, 2010

The Day I took Away Santa

It's been craziness, wrapped in chaos, and tied up with a big bow of peppermint flavored stress over here these days. I know what you are thinking; its the holidays.It's like this for everybody. Suck it, Truthful Mommy! And I do realize that along with being the "most wonderful" time of the year it is also fraught with balding stress ( for me anyways)What you're not balding? Well, then obviously I am more stressed than you.I win!Score!

I am no more pitiful than the rest of you or inundated with any more responsibility. But, this week is not a good week for this Mommy to have so much on her plate. This Mommy is trying to recoup emotionally and psychologically, not to mention physically, from the last month.Add to the mix a healthy  dose of exhaustion and cramps and there you have it; Mommy needs a rest preferably without the side of sass.

I find myself teetering between thinking my girls are the best thing since Ding Dongs were invented and quite possibly the spawn of Spongebob ( you know adorable to most but ever so annoying that you'd just like to bash your head into the wall?) Anyways, most of our days start off with good intentions then they wake up and dawdle ( like real life, slower than molasses dawdling. It requires a concerted effort on their part!) then they get dressed and eat even slower than that. Then trying to wrangle them into their hats, gloves, scarves, coats and boots must burn at least 500 calories.I'm exhausted before we even leave the house.

Then I drop of my 5 year old and she is adorable with her kisskiss " Love you Mommy" and wave.My ears perk up a bit.Then my 3 year old is absolutely freaking cuteness for the next 3 hours,usually singing songs, randomly bestowing hugs and saying "Me love you Mommy".Then its pick up time.Then hell breaks lose. Trying to wrangle tired, hungry kids back into the car is worse than trying to get the out the door. Then there is whining, loads and loads of whining.We discuss our plan of attack for the afternoon, then somehow between the ride home and lunch, they turn into someone else's children. Someone whose children I'd like to be able to send home!

Today, sometime in that time is when it happened. Seems the Santa threats and now even the kneecap busting elves are of no consequence. Instead, these two, seemingly innocuous to the naked eye, girls are taunting me, ignoring me and defying me at every turn.Pick up your room! NO!Finish your lunch!Nah!Stop hitting your sister!Complete silence, in observation of what an apparently stupid asshole I am for thinking they are going to listen to anything I say!Today, I told them, " If you don't behave for the rest of the day, Santa won't be coming to Grandma's house!"( They hire a Santa to come visit the girls at their annual holiday party) My  5 year old went on about disobeying me and my 3 year old looked me in the face and said( all exasperated like) : "Me know! Me heard you!No Santa!" And that was the moment that I realized that I had lost all credibility with my girls.My threats have become idle.They called my bluff.So, even though I didn't necessarily want to...I canceled Santa. I took Santa away from my girls.*(Hangs her head in shame)*. I don't think they believe I will follow through but little do they know, in the heat of the moment I texted the Big Guy and there will be NO Santa at the party. They will know I am serious on Saturday when there is NO Santa HoHoHoIng.Of course,that is assuming they make it to the party. They may be sitting home learning a lesson! We will see what tomorrow brings!

What threats have you made that you had to follow through with even though you may not have wanted to? How do you handle it when your kids completely ignore your requests to cooperate and behave?

15 comments:

  1. Oh, I can SO relate! Isabella and Jeremiah had been talking about going to the candy store all week a while back but when the day came they wouldn't stop fighting, yelling, pinching each other! I pulled the whole "If anyone screams again we will NOT be going to the candy shop!!!!" Not 2 minutes later were they screaming at full force. Sadly, we couldn't go...and I have to say after that mess of a day I really, really could have used some toffee or fudge or something! I felt horrible, but they had to know I meant business.

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  2. @Krysta,
    Doesn't it super suck when we end up punishing ourselves too?I hate that!I don't know what's gotten into my girls.they have went off the deep end. I think its the fact that they have just been spread too thin lately but I can't allow them to behave so badly.I had to put my foot down.Hope this all it takes to teach them that I am serious!This is hard!

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  3. I am a firm believer in following through with what ever you say, or they will do just as yours have done and call your bluff. Eventually they figure out they are idle threats and nothing is really going to happen.
    I also believe consistency is the key with children.

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  4. @Day2DayLiving,
    I've learned my lesson, the hard way.They had me so upset yesterday, I was pretty much close to having a full on ugly cry because I HATE to be ignored but I couldn't let them see me get that upset because then...they win!So,I canceled Santa and it really felt kinda good. I know Ill feel bad on Saturday when they are waiting and he never shows but I think they need me to follow through.They've pushed the limits and now they must know where the boundaries are.I have to dole out some tough love:( I'm tough,I can do it! Just keep reminding me, my friend!!

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  5. Great job!! They will probably learn more from just this one punishment than any others. Last year, my middle son almost lost Christmas all together. I was fully prepared to just stash his back for later. It would have broken my heart to see him cry on Christmas morning, so I'm very thankful he straightened his little butt up.

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  6. @Ambrosia,
    I know,I hope it takes. I do NOT want to take away Christmas.They've been a little better today. Not as much of crazy going on. I couldn't handle if I had to take away Christmas.But I cant keep giving chances.I can't!I;m staying strong and praying they stay on the straight and narrow!

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  7. You are such a good mom! I made threats too and I *hate* it when I have to follow through. Becuase they have no idea how much it hurts us when we can't take them to Chuck E. Cheese's after all or let them have that play date or visit from Santa. It is so hard to be a parent that follows through. But if you can do that, your kids will respect you so much and they are going to be awesome in the coming years when their behavior really counts! Rock on, TruthfulMomma!

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  8. How do I handle it? Dooode, I don't know- don't ask me hard questions!
    I can't believe you took Santa away- but in a way, it kind of makes you my hero. Sometimes they need to know mommy means business... or something like that.

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  9. I once said if they didn't pick up their toys, i was tossing them out. The whole living room. They didn't listen, i bagged them up and put them out to the trash. Yep. Empty threats don't fly w/ this kid ;)

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  10. I completely agree that you HAVE to follow through on threats because these kids get older and they need to believe you! One of the worst ones? My daughter, now 10, was about 4 or 5 and throwing a huge fit and kept throwing things. And I told her if she threw anything else I would take it away. She was on her bed and threw stuffed animals and kicked pillows and blankets. The poor girl could not stop and she ended up with NOTHING on her bed but a sheet at bedtime. She ended up getting a pillow and blanket for sleeping but I kept everything else for two weeks and she had to earn it back with good behavior! ~ thirstymagnolia

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  11. Sounds like those girls have spunk like their mama! lol.
    I am horrible. I threaten and then forget I threatened. My kids usually remember though. I will ask, "why aren't you playing on Webkins?" My daughter, "Cuz you said I can't. Remember, I didn't do my homework?" So is that bad mothering? I forget but they go ahead and continue the punishment. I must have wierd kids.
    They are on to me. My son is 12 and my daughter is 10 and they are getting keen on the fact that I don't follow through. They are getting sneaky about it. Like I was with my mom, so I'm a pro and I'm on to them. Unless Real Housewizes is on, then I pretend to not know and let dad handle it.
    Also, if I do follow through I usually give them a 2nd chance. (I forget AND I'm a pushover.) Like, ok, you forgot to wash the dishes, wash them now 5 times in a row and you can have your game back. I guess it kinda teaches them not to do the bad deed to begin with. I was raised Catholic so it must come from "you kissed a boy, you're going to hell, UNLESS you pray 10 Hail Marys".
    Dad follows through and I am thankful for that. And if the deed is really bad, like bad grades, hurting each other, etc I do follow through. But the everyday sibling spats and forgetting chores I am more lax.
    My philosophy: Nurture, punish, teach everything now so they can leave at 18. LOL!

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  12. We so tried this with the 2.5 year old last night "Santa doesnt bring present to children who don't eat their dinner." Didn't phase her.

    I don't believe leaving her at the table until she eats works either (didnt with me, you?).

    Damn, I really hoped someone had the answer. Though MommaKiss is my role model. LOVE her take no prisoners attitude.

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  13. Oh I've so been there, Mama! The threats! The annoying kids! The whining! Fortheloveofgod the whining! Hang in there. Mama-karma says that tomorrow *has* to be better!

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  14. my son has begun to call my bluff too its time i take action! For the past hour ive been telling him if he didnt clean his room i was throwing the toys away....well since hes getting new for christmas anyway here comes the garbage bag.. i was gonna do it anyway but maybe if he thinks im doing it bc hes not listening he'll know i mean business!

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  15. well, I don't like fits in the car. I need to concentrate on driving....so one time while I am driving cross counry on I 70...my oldest keeps poking my in the head and back with an umbrella.
    I say "If you don't stop, It's going out the window" She did it one more time and fwap! out the window it went. Since that fateful day 10 years ago I have not had one incident. When ever my youngest tries something similar, my oldest says..."I wouldn't" then relates that story. I am a firm believer in one good swift kick in the rear instead of 20 love taps.
    Good luck.

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