Thursday, July 29, 2010

Mommy Truisms; Because knowing is half the battle

With each passing day of Motherhood, I learn more truths about life, motherhood, children, and surprisingly, myself. I'm sure most of you can relate and agree. Some of you may not, but wait, it may be too early in your Mothering to have seen all this come to fruition..but it will.  Happy Mothering!
  • There is no true handbook for labor because no one would believe it.
  • There is no effectively honest handbook about being a Mommy because it is truly an indescribable experience.
  • Sometimes, Mommies just need a hug.
  • Washing your pits, your face, and your feet~ does not a shower make!Make the time Mommies, no one wants to be the stinky mom. And no kid wants to have the stinky mom!
  • Coffee and wine are Mommy versions of reds and Valium.
  • Once you have children, your once beloved pet ( your "first" child) becomes secondary to you and a jungle gym for the kids. No matter how much you loved the dog, no mater how much you spent on doggie clothes, or that Coach doggie collar ( don't judge me), no matter if that dog even had a middle name and a place at the kitchen table...that dog is now..secondary!
  • Cereal for dinner is perfectly acceptable in a crunch; no Mommy guilt needed. Hell, in a real pinch...string cheese, apple juice, and a piece of peanut butter toast can pass.(that's what I refer to as the MacGyver dinner) If they are still hungry, give them some cereal:)
  • Kid's won't starve themselves; when they are hungry they will eat! Forcing them to eat when they are not hungry is only going to cause chaos, tantrums and unnecessary gray hairs for you.
  • Comparing your children to other children is ridiculous and degrading; don't do it!
  • A dusty house is infinitely more acceptable than a dirty kid. And there is no excuse for a kid running around in a shitty diaper for prolonged periods of time unless a) your sniffer's broke b)you are lying dead on the living room floor!
  • It's perfectly acceptable to fight for yourself as much and as hard as you fight for your children. You are worth it!
  • In Motherhood, most days of life are like a box of chocolates and you never know what great surprise you're going to get but some days..it's like a burning bag of shit; and all you can do is take a deep breath, hold your nose and put out the fire.

7 comments:

  1. What an excellent, excellent list. I'm especially with you on labor, coffee and red wine, cereal for dinner, kids will eat when they're hungry, and fighting for yourself!! Clearly, I'm with you on all of it :).

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  2. This is a wonderful list! I love it ! :)

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  3. I loved loved loved the last one!

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  4. This is so great girl! You said it perfectly. I love the one about the diaper, unless you are lying dead on the floor, LOL!

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  5. I must say that I agree with almost everything you put up here, actually I agree with everything. :)

    I love the McGyver menu! How funny! And the thing about them not starving themselves - I've been preaching that for YEARS!!!!!!!!!!

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  6. Love this post! Speaking the truth, the whole truth and nothing but the truth...amen.

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Love to hear your thoughts on my truth! Please leave some love, insight , or even disagreement with mine. I believe in free thought and speech. Happy Mothering!!