Mommy Truisms:The Dangerous games Mommies play edition

It's time for a few more of my Mommy truisms.Growing sisterhood through motherhood, one truism at a time! Enjoy.

• Being a new parent is like high school,everything is life or death and you are certain that each wrong decision will ruin the rest of your life.But in the end, you grow through it, survive it, and become a better version of yourself. 

• Conjugalorium:another word for a co-sleepers unused bedroom.Go ahead, you paid for it.Someone should be using that extra bed.

• Sometimes kids will get completely naked to use the bathroom.Don't ask why.You will not receive a coherent explanation.Save yourself the brain hurt.

• Having children is like walking around the world with an open wound.
   

• 8 out of 10 parents co sleep with their children at some point in their childhood; 2 out of 10 admit it!
   

• Bending down, using your stern voice and scolding an adult who has wronged you is perfectly acceptable behavior from a mother.

• When your 3 year old screams incessantly "Me hate you!", as much as you'd like to say,"Oh yeah, you are NOT my favorite person right now either" hold your tongue.They will hear you.They will remember it and you will pay for your slip for the rest of your life!

• Cherish your spouse; they are your forever, children are just a temporary horror show.

• Hiding in the bushes in the dark, in a dark hallway or under the basement stairs and jumping out to scare your kids is perfectly acceptable at Halloween, but only if you have first made sure they are not inflicted with long QT syndrome.
   

• Not allowing your child to go on a field trip with 47 children, 2 teachers and NO chaperones is not only a good idea, its pretty much required for safety.

• Handing children sippy cups, goldfish or cheerios, stopping skirmishes, searching for dropped crayons, holding ice cream cones, changing Barbies & babies, and changing a DVD, lowering or raising the volume, hitting play or wiping clean are all activities that you do in the car that are MORE dangerous to the safety of your children than using your cell phone.

• Sometimes a spontaneous dance party is exactly what is needed to save the day!

• There is no such thing as loving on your child too much.Go ahead.Try.I dare you.It can't be done. Children deserve all the love that you can possibly give to them.

• Knowing the previous information, NEVER withhold your love from your child as a punishment.If you do, you are the mental defect and should be judged accordingly.

• Parenthood is an endless succession of minutia, but pay attention, within the minutia is hidden the most spectacular miracles.

Happy Mothering and come back for tonight's Throat Punch Thursday post.