Sunday, May 17, 2009

Bringing Home Baby

I will never forget the moment the nurse came into my room and said,"OK, as soon as we can get you a wheel chair, you guys can go home." She shared a warm, heartfelt smile with the three of us, this new family of ours. My heart sank, my stomach turned, and my eyes immediately welled up with tears. I was frightened and overwhelmed, excited and ecstatic but I felt like I was going to vomit. I looked at my, obviously, just as freaked out husband and I whispered, " Are they really going to let us go home with her?" I knew the answer. I had been planning on this moment since the moment I knew I was pregnant. But amongst all the anticipation, I had forgotten that, in the end, this tiny, newborn baby was going Home with us.I thought to myself, "My God, what will we do with her? She is so tiny" In my head, I just knew, she was so perfect..I didn't want to be the one responsible for messing her up. They make you take a test and get a license to drive a car but no test, no license, no qualifications for taking care of a baby.It really is insane. At that moment, as we were staring at this tiny little piece of perfection strapped into the giant , all engulfing car seat, scared witless , the nurse came in with the wheelchair. I sit down in the wheel chair and I realize that this is truly the first day of the rest of my life.Absolutely everything that I have known up to this point is completely irrelevant in my life and I don't care. As they place my beautiful , little miracle into my lap, our eyes lock and her gaze holds me. I am in love, deeper then anything I have ever known. In that millisecond, I have become an extra in my own life and she is the star...and I wouldn't have it any other way.


  1. Such a universal moment and so well put!

  2. Beautifully written. So true. It's so overwhelming. I think I went numb at that moment and was like WOAH! It's time. I think my husband felt sick. ;)


Love to hear your thoughts on my truth! Please leave some love, insight , or even disagreement with mine. I believe in free thought and speech. Happy Mothering!!